The five people around you

Birds of the same feather flock together. This age-old proverb is more than sufficient to let us know that we get along with people who are similar to us, who think like us and have similar interests like that of us. The environment we are in automatically influences our knowledge, character and attitudes. Our environment is not formed by anyone who stays far away from us. It's always influenced by people around us. That is where a very important lesson that my mentor had taught me long time back comes into picture. Your being is formed based on the five people with whom you spend your most time with.

Most of our habits are derived from our parents or guardians because they are the first set of people with whom we spend our starting years of life. Next come our siblings or other family members and then the school atmosphere. All these factors influence only the early years of our lives during which things are mouldable in us. After a decade of experience on this earth starts our real influence and from that point onwards we start choosing the kind of people with whom we would want to be surrounded with. As we grow through years of life the people with whom we spend most of our time becomes a limited set of 5-10 people. These are the people who shall impact our lives from very close distance. That is where choosing the right set of people around us becomes very important. Our character shall automatically get framed as the average of five characters around us. Choosing them well is our responsibility. One must have a clear vision of what kind of a person s/he wishes to become in life, and only then can one choose those people who are already living a life that s/he dreams of. Finding five such people and being in daily interaction with them can help you create a life you dream of much earlier than you have actually planned or believed in, because now, even the environment around you is accelerating the process. Hence it becomes very much important to choose the right five people in life.

What happens if you don't find those 5 key people around you? As per Murphy's Law, you are surely going to find someone else for sure, but beware not to choose that person who cannot resonate with your dream life. Be alone at that point of time just using your Law of Attraction and asking the universe to bring the kind of people you want in your life. Let the universe take care of the rest. Being alone you are already spending time with a serious person in you who is serious about the future dreams. Who better a person can you find other than you? Make use of the friend in yourself and keep your search on for those five diamonds in your life who shall come and shine your life much better than that of theirs.

Responses differ at times

The most unpredictable thing on this earth is the mood of a person. You might have experienced it many times that the same friend of yours reacts in different ways for the same thing at different times. The reason is the change in mood of your friend. The teacher comes to class and scolds even the best student for no reason while the same teacher on some other day is cool with the antics of the students. Once again the mood of the teacher was responsible for this contradictory behaviour.

 

Incidents on a daily basis keep influencing our moods and emotions. The worst part is that they carry their impact on other things that later enter the daily schedule of a person. As a result, the other things face a response which is a carry-over from the earlier experience. It so happens that we are not aware about what kind of a situation that a person has undergone before we go up to him/her to share our thoughts. At such times, the imagination of the response of the person in our mind is much different that that happens in the real scenario. At such times we make a general mistake that we conclude about the character or the attitude of the person which is not completely right. All of us are humans and not hard stones. As a result our moods are bound to swing with varied experiences across a day. So, whenever the response from a person is different from what we expected because of the wrong mood, instead of getting disappointed we should give some time or soothening words to the person to come back to the normal state and then re-narrate our words.

 

Not just humans, even non-living things respond differently under different circumstances. A very simple example is that of an iron rod which gets bent very easily when heated but is strong as a rock when cold and unbreakable. Understand the situation of a person before evaluating his/her response or attitude. You can feel free to share your feedback on is.mohanbn@gmail.com
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Listen to what you talk

Thanks to the Almighty who has blessed humans with wonderful sense organs and also has given the right usage to each one of them. Even animals have tongue but they can't use it to talk like us. Barring a few exceptions of people with special abilities most of us are lucky enough to have this wonderful ability to talk and communicate with ourselves and with others. We keep talking the whole day with our family, relatives, friends, colleagues and sometimes strangers as well. Sometimes we chatter even while sleeping and indeed its fun to watch those who do this. There is a famous saying that our thoughts become our words and our words become our actions. Probably its too difficult to control our thoughts but my question is can we control what we talk?

We chat about innumerable topics and gossips, we talk about cinema, politics, religions, opinions, sports and trillion of other topics. Most of the times our thoughts just get converted into words and flow out of our mouth. There is no check in between whether what we are talking is going to make some sense or not. Also our ears are not placed in front of our mouth, they are placed on either sides of it far from it. Seldom our ears actually listen to what we say. They are more inclined towards listening to what the others have to say. Even physically its tough to bring your ears near your mouth. I was just thinking, had it been the case somehow that our ears would have been the first to listen to whatever we spoke then this world would have been rid of half of the talk pollution that exists now. The ability to talk is called in Sanskrit as 'Waakchhakthi'. I probably couldn't write in sanskrit here. 'Waak' means to talk, 'shakthi' means power, both combine to give the word 'Waakchhakthi' which means the Power to Talk. In the autobiography of Mahatma Gandhiji, he explains how he used this power of talking so well that his silence and his words were both equally powerful enough to help him become powerful to lead huge masses. Even Rajnikanth explains that when you're silent, people wait to listen to you talking and when you talk they give their full concentration. Also the weightage to the words of a guy who speaks less is more than that for others who keep blabbering always. Use your power to talk wisely.

Feedback loop is one of the best ways to drive ourselves towards perfection. I suggest you to listen to what you talk. Pay complete attention to what you're saying, record it and play it again in your mind and try if you can find a better way of saying the same. This will not only improve your efficiency but will also fill the necessary power into your words. When you analyse what you want to speak, you will definitely convey more in less words. This will strengthen your mental ability as well. Silence has power, control yourself from blabbering unnecessary speeches because people characterize you by the way you speak. Don't allow yourself to become a chatterox, listen to yourself- what you talk to others and what you talk to yourself in your mind. Filter off the junk and produce the required right combination. Lets utilize Waakchhakthi - the power to talk in the best way possible.

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