My grandma's technique

It is amazing to find that the degree of education need not determine the level of wisdom a person gains through the experiences of life. There are loads of examples on this earth of people who were very bad or very low in terms of their formal education but were really marvellous at their intellectual quotient to handle all the circumstances to create a nische for themselves in this world. I am not going to speak about any such personality today. I am going to narrate you about my very own grandmother's high level management technique.

I have been doing a lot of variety of work right from my schooling. I don't like to spend away the time of my life. Rather, I like to invest it like how I am doing while writing this blog. In this continuous spree of doing different things I couldn't keep up to the normal expected timing standards of a typical Indian family of coming back home before it's too dark. Also I had come up with some serious decisions for my own life to turn around things on my own shoulders which were quite far-fetched ideas for a conventional type of family like mine who were all into jobs. At this time all the elders in my family had a worry about the path that I was pursuing but none could question me about the same since I was very adamant to follow the path I had chosen. All the information that they could get was only from me and they couldn't share their fears with me. At this time my grandmother who has studied just upto 4th standard came up with a wonderful technique.

She was supportive of everything I was doing in front of me. When I was not at home, she shared her part of the worry with my uncle and got him to come over and see me work and colleagues without me knowing at all. She was so intelligent that she made sure that I didn't feel that my family didn't trust me but still got the confirmation of all that I was saying was true. She is 80 plus years of age now but has this immense wisdom of balancing fears and emotions. This can be one of the best management lessons of how to gather information but still make sure that the person in concern doesn't feel hurt because emotions and trust are the two main important entities in management and business. I hope you found my grandma's technique useful for you as well. You can write to me on is.mohanbn@gmail.com

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Maintain distance

The world is in itself a family and all of us belong to that. All of us have to gel with each other and cooperate to make the world a happy place to dwell in. Humans should not allow their ego to come in between relationships and make the best use of different talents of different people to yield the best positive results to the team. Every moment of our life we keep interacting with one or the other person either directly or indirectly as man is a social being. During these interactions our relationship grows to different extents with different people. So what is the extent to which another person can interact with us or to what extent can we take the other person for granted is dependent on the distance that's maintained between us.

In case of a stranger, the distance is just infinite because neither you nor the stranger interact with each other. In case of parents or spouse, I feel its the shortest distance that can be maintained in life which tends to zero. In case of relatives, friends and colleagues this distance between you and them takes different sizes. Its very important for us to understand that we can't be close to everyone like that of a family. So there should be some extent of limitation for any kind of relationship outside family. Neither can you take anyone for granted nor should you allow anyone to take you for granted. Always keep your mind clear enough to recognise when either of you are crossing the boundaries. In case of any relationship it is necessary for you to clearly understand what is the respect and dignity that needs to be exchanged between the two of you. Sometimes either we get too harsh to enter the personal space of someone else or on the other hand we become too modest to allow the other person to intrude into our personal space. Just make sure that you alert yourself when you get into any of these scenarios. If its the first case, please don't have the ego to apologise to the other person for stepping a bit extra and if its the second case, inform the other person in gentle words that he/she is crossing his/her limits. Else the relationship is going to ruin one step ahead for sure.

I wanted to narrate some personal experiences in this blog but have avoided it only because my reader shouldn't get influenced by them. Everyone has self-respect and love for one's own interests in this world. At anytime a comment on it by an outsider always hurts. I feel in this world people are killed more by words rather than bombs or swords or guns. Let's spread smile and sweet feelings all around us by maintaining proper distance. Please feel free to share your feedback on is.mohanbn@gmail.com

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