"Being Transparent" could also have been the title of this blog. Can your thoughts, words and actions be in sync always? In the normal world there is world of a difference between what we think, what we talk and what we do. Why does this happen is the question of this context? Is it really that difficult or problematic to speak out what you are literally feeling!
You are walking to a class and you find a student in a very nice dress. Will you appreciate immediately or think what would he or she reply if you appreciated? Or there might be an ego inside you which may lead you otherwise saying he might be in a good dress but he is not a topper like you. When teacher explains a very good point in the class, do you acknowledge that or still keep regretting as to why took that course? When you come home late you know that your parents are angry about it. So do you apologise for it or justify the reason that you were late for? There are lot of choices of responses for all of the above questions. But the final destination of choice lies in your conscious which knows if you are really accepting the truth or you are trying to cover up the negligence.
There are lot of barriers in the world of feelings and emotions that bind us in such a way that we cant even breathe through the knots. Your heart craves to have a mercedes but the brain stops you from expressing the wish as it knows the practicality. Your intellect understands the high calibre of your colleague but your ego stops from appreciating that. Your soul cries out of pain when you come across a mishappening but your pride of being a MAN stops you from shedding those tears which inturn fill up a tsunami inside you. Your friendship calls you to call your friend the fourth time but your self-respect stops you from even picking up the phone. The child inside you wants to play with the kids on the street doing hip-hop but the adolescence on top of you forbids the same. You want to hug your friend during the most sensitive situation but the question 'what will others think of you?' keeps you both apart.
I have tried to portray some of the fightings of feelings inside us in this blog. Please let me know if you also fight day and night through this war of life on firstname.lastname@example.org